Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Day 16--Does the single adult have full ownership of her own body?

"Dad says I can get out
when I turn 35--maybe."
            Yesterday, the topic centered on how a person's body belongs to his or her spouse as much as it does to himself/herself*.  Another question suggested yesterday may touch your family in a bigger way:  What about the single adult?  Does the single adult have full ownership of her own body?

            Putting aside the knowledge that your body is a gift from God and you are a steward entrusted to care for it, the conclusion still comes down to the fact that your body is not really your own either.  The majority of people will get married.  Thus, your body also belongs to your future spouse—not to a dating partner, not even to a fiancĂ©—but to your future spouse. 

            What do you want your future husband doing with his body before marrying you?  How many people do you want him to be intimate with physically before joining you in bed on your wedding night?   (If you are a man, what do you want your wife to be doing with other men?)  Shouldn't you try to behave the way you would like your husband to behave?  Despite what you see in sitcoms or t.v. dramas, casual sex is not a painless, victim-less activity. 

            Your turn:  Are you saying: "That sounds fine and dandy, but why should I have expected that from my husband before we got married when I  could not do the same for him?  I was well beyond any type of sexual purity.  And who am I to expect a "pure" lifestyle from my children as young adults when I failed myself?" 
            Our standards and goals should be based on the guidelines given to us by God, not based on what we have done or not done in the past.  He loves us and wants the best for us.  He can see and understand way beyond anything we will ever be able to comprehend.  At the same time, we are born as imperfect sinners.  Even if you have given your life to Christ, you will still make sinful choices either by accident or on purpose.  Yet, God is greater than any sin we may commit.  He is faithful to forgive those who repent, and possibly just as important—He is able to heal us when we fall.

            No matter what you have done in the past, your next choice can turn you toward the way you should go.  That, my friend, is the first Biblical truth from today's discussion to teach your children. 

            Your children are going to sin.  When they do, forgive them and guide them toward making right decisions.  Remind them that God will forgive them, too, when they repent.  At the same time, He asks us to forgive others, including future spouses.  Although you can begin teaching positive attitudes toward sexual purity before your children are taught anything about sex, you can give them more details as they are ready.  Specifics can be discussed in this blog at a later time. 

            Right now, concentrate on teaching them that (1) God's laws are good and should be followed even if they do not make sense to us all the time, (2) they can be forgiven when they mess up, and (3) they should forgive others as well.  This foundation can help your family members get through many of the messy situations that will touch them, including decisions they make regarding their bodies.

*I do not like playing the "his/her" game, and since most of the people who comment on my blog are women, I'm just going to use feminine pronouns unless I am specifically talking specifically about male person.

            If you would like more ideas on helping your children (and yourself) develop a Biblical worldview or to find out how to win a Wal-Mart gift card, go to the 31 Days Giveaway (Intro. Part II) post for more Touching Families blog links.  If you want to check out other 31 Days' topics, see The Nester.

*All verses quoted are from the New International Version:  THE HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®, NIV® Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.™ Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

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