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| Is that true?! |
Did you
hear about that embarrassing photo taken of Princess Kate? Well, I guess her title isn't officially
"princess." I think it's
Duchess of something. And did you hear
about the stars of Twilight? They were living together and he was going to
propose but then he found out that she was having an affair with their director
so he told her to get out but now I think I heard that they are getting back
together and he forgave her. What did
you hear about it?
Have you
overheard a conversation like this?
Unfortunately, many of us have—or have been one of the partakers in such
a conversation. Gossip touches families in
a big way, but we often do not notice it.
Why? Because it can be difficult
to recognize—since gossip can disguise itself like interesting conversation.
What does
the Bible say about gossip?
I Timothy 5:13 " . . . And not only do they become
idlers, but also gossips and
busybodies, saying things they ought not to."
It appears
gossip can start when we have too much time on our hands and not enough to keep
us busy. That's when we start getting to
other people's business, adding a little input of our own, and simply start
saying things we should not be saying.
Proverbs 20:19 "A gossip
betrays a confidence; so avoid a man who talks too much."
If someone
takes too much pleasure in talking for the sake of talking, he will eventually
run out of reasonable information to discuss, which means he will start saying
some things he should not be saying.
Sometimes they are true; sometimes, not.
Regardless, nothing you tell that person will remain unsaid.
Romans 1:29-32 "They have become filled with every kind
of wickedness, evil, greed, and depravity.
They are full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, and malice. They are gossips,
slanders, God-haters, insolent, arrogant, and boastful; they invent ways of
doing evil; they disobey their parents; they are senseless, faithless,
heartless, ruthless. Although they know
God's righteous decree that those who do such things deserve death; they not
only continue to do these very things but also approve of those who practice
them."
You might
be wondering why I used such a large passage when gossip is only mentioned in
the second line. Look at this long list
of "sins." Gossip sits between
murder and God-haters. I don't know
about you, but I often hear people carelessly throw around the "idea"
of gossip as no big deal. In fact,
gossip is often sought and praised. Look
at all the tabloid magazines and exposé t.v. shows. If audiences did not crave gossip, those
businesses would not exist. Yet, God
puts gossip in the same list as "every kind of wickedness" and those
who do it as "deserving death."
Quite a different perspective.
I Timothy 3:11 "In the same
way, their wives are to be women worthy of respect, not malicious talkers but temperate and trustworthy in
everything."
Now we have
an example of the lack of gossip. In
some Bibles malicious talkers is translated as gossips. Here, one of the conditions to be worthy of
respect and trustworthy in everything is not be a gossip. Which do you want to be known as: a gossip or a trustworthy person deserving
respect?
Your Turn: Of course, your children should not hear you
participating in gossip as a speaker or listener, but this is one of those
topics that is easier to bring up with your kids. Start with brainstorming about what gossip is
and then share some of these Scriptures with your children. This should stimulate a good discussion on a
Biblical worldview of gossip. The
examples you use will vary depending on the ages of your children, and this
would also be great to discuss as the topic comes up naturally. And, it will come up naturally. You bet.
They will be sure to tell you about some gossip they have heard at some
point. Help them recognize something as
gossip with questions.
Is it true?
Do you know all the facts?
Has someone else added facts, left important facts out, or
stretched the truth?
Where did you hear it?
Did you hear it from the person involved?
If not, did you ask that person about it?
If you are not willing to discuss it with the person it is
about, should you really be discussing it with other people?
If the person who told you this knew you were repeating it,
would he/she be happy with you or upset/?
Is it uplifting and worth repeating?
As they get
older and better understand your low tolerance for gossip, they may stop
sharing some gossip with you. The good
part of that situation is that you have taught them the Biblical view of gossip
so well they know when they have crossed the line with gossip. The sad part is that they may not care they
crossed the line. At that point you have
a different problem.
Of course,
some information your child will share with you will not pass the test of the
questions above, but it should be discussed with you anyway. Private matters, matters of concern or
confusion, and matters simply a part of your child's day should be shared
without reservation. Conversation is not
the same as gossip. Being able to
distinguish the difference is a skill that will not only touch your family in a
positive way, but also the world around you (and your children).
If you would like
more ideas on helping your children (and yourself) develop a Biblical worldview
or to find out how to win a Wal-Mart gift card, go to the 31Days Giveaway (Intro. Part II) post for more Touching Families
blog links. If you want to check out other 31 Days' topics, see The Nester.
*All verses quoted are from the New International Version: THE
HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®, NIV® Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011
by Biblica, Inc.™ Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.
