#14— Stepping Up to the Plate

26 Expressions of Love and Kindness Plus 1

#14— Stepping Up to the Plate

            I did not grow up in a sports family.  Our television was often found broadcasting the same types of shows over and over, but sports was not usually included in our family's line-up.  I played some park recreational basketball while in elementary school, but that was about the extent of my playing sports.  (Although I got involved with cheerleading, the pom pon squad, and martial arts, I do not consider those the same as playing—and then being able to coach—team sports.)  

            As a result, I would consider the tireless efforts of volunteer park league coaches as true acts of kindness that touch an endless number of families.  Recreational team sports have taken a toll on our family with seven children playing basketball, softball, and soccer if it is available.  However drained we might feel with the time (and money) commitment that accompanies these activities, it is not the same as if we were coaching these sports as well.

            So, here's my hat off to the coaches, score keepers, clock runners, etc., that make recreational sports possible for our community's young children.  Despite the fact that you may have gotten involved only to keep the program alive so your children could play, no family would be able to participate if you had not been willing to step up to the plate and carry some of the responsibility that make park recreational sports possible.

#13— A Little Time for a Stranger

26 Expressions of Love and Kindness Plus 1

#13— A Little Time for  a Stranger

            Sometimes an expression of kindness can simply be sharing some minutes out of your day to listen to someone else.  I had the privilege of touching someone this way (and receiving the same courtesy) just this week. 

            I made arrangements to meet with a delightful woman I was acquainted with several years ago.  She has reached a different stage in her life and had some questions for me.  (In other words, I am much older, and she wanted to talk to someone who has been there and done that.)  Conveniently, we met at a fast food restaurant about half way between our two towns. 

           

            Regardless whether I was of any help to her or not, I was energized and refreshed after our two-hour discussion that sped by before we knew it.  However, my emphasis is not on this discussion, but on the one that followed.  After we expressed our good-byes and I was gathering up my things, a woman from a table nearby came over to me.  "I'm sorry that I overheard part of your discussion.  I was not meaning to eavesdrop, but can I ask you some questions, too?"

            Apparently our original discussion was exactly the same topic that this woman had been discussing with a couple of her friends over the past few weeks.  Isn't it amazing how we "happened" to be sitting there together?  God knew who needed to talk to whom that day.  Well, I spent a few minutes discussing the topic on her mind, but then she went on to tell me an hour's worth of semi-related stories while her husband read the newspaper in the next booth.  This delightful woman obviously had a lot on her mind, and I will probably remember some of the things that she shared for a long time. 

            Although I had no obligation to listen to this stranger and had no promise of financial gain by doing so, my expression of kindness to listen to her ended up touching me—and my husband since I went home and shared some of her stories—and all it took was a little of my time.

#12—The Power of a Cookie

26 Expressions of Love and Kindness Plus 1

#12—The Power of a Cookie

            Traditionally, when someone passed away, neighbors, friends, church family members, and extended family members would provide meals for the family as an expression of love and kindness.  To a certain extent that is still done today, but I do not think it is as common as it used to be.  Yet, families are touched and souls are nourished by condolences expressed through food.

            I had intended to carry on this tradition with a recent loss of a family friend, but I was not sure where to take a meal.   The family was often absent from the house of the deceased to take care of related legal matters.  Therefore, I opted to provide cookies to the family.  Some of the cookies were the soft, delicious kind from the bakery section of a grocery store, and others were homemade.

            The homemade cookies came from a recipe we had received from the man we now miss.  I do not know if it is a cookie he had shared with his family or not.  I hoped it was.  I thought it might both trigger fond memories of his good cooking and exhibit some of the influence he had had on our family.  I know nothing I did to touch this family wiped away their pain, but I hope the cookies had the power to say, "Your loved one was special to us, and we miss him, too."

#11— Burned Biscuits That Taste Like Love

26 Expressions of Love and Kindness Plus 1

#11—Burned Biscuits That Taste Like Love

            The following tips are NOT mine.  I would love to give credit to the author, but I received it in a forwarded email.  However, I thought it fit perfectly with my theme for this month, and I hope it will touch you and your family.  Enjoy.  I will add a comment of my own at the end.

            When I was a kid, my Mom liked to make breakfast food for dinner every now and then. And I remember one night in particular when she had made breakfast after a long, hard day at work.  On that evening so long ago, my Mom placed a plate of eggs, sausage and extremely burned biscuits in front of my dad.  I remember waiting to see if anyone noticed!  Yet all my dad did was reach for his biscuit, smile at my Mom and ask me how my day was at school. I don't remember what I told him that night, but I do remember watching him smear butter and jelly on that ugly burned biscuit.  He ate every bite of that thing; never made a face nor uttered a word about it! When I got up from the table that evening, I remember hearing my Mom apologize to my dad for burning the biscuits.  And I'll never forget what he said: "Honey, I love burned biscuits every now and then."

            Later that night, I went to kiss Daddy good night and I asked him if he really liked his biscuits burned. He wrapped me in his arms and said, "Your Momma put in a hard day at work today and she's real tired; and besides a little burned biscuit never hurt anyone!"

            As I've grown older, I've thought about that many times. Life is full of imperfect things and imperfect people. I'm not the best at hardly anything, and I forget birthdays and anniversaries just like everyone else. But what I've learned over the years is that learning to accept each other's faults and choosing to celebrate each other's differences is one of the most important keys to creating a healthy, growing, and lasting relationship. 

            And that's my prayer for you today... that you will learn to take the good, the bad, and the ugly parts of your life and lay them at the feet of God.  Because in the end, He's the only One who will be able to give you a relationship where a burnt biscuit isn't a deal-breaker! We could extend this to any relationship. In fact, understanding is the base of any relationship, be it a husband-wife or parent-child or friendship!  So, please pass me a biscuit, and yes, the burned one will do just fine.  Be kinder than necessary because everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle. "Life without God is like an unsharpened pencil - it has no point"

            --Now you are back to me.  What a wonderful expression of love and kindness!  How about choosing to eat a burned biscuit this week?  What will your burned biscuit be?  Literally, a food that is less than desirable?  An inconsiderate co-worker?  Being taken for granted by your family?  If you put your "burned biscuit" in light of the above perspective, you might discover that it tastes a little like love.

#10—Kindness Isn't Always Easy or Fun

26 Expressions of Love and Kindness Plus 1

#10— Kindness Isn't Always Easy or Fun

            Have you missed me?  Sometimes a glitch in life can throw off the best of plans.  I will try to get caught up on a few expressions of love and kindness in the next few days, so I can hopefully end the month well.

            This past Friday, my husband, my 18-year old daughter, and I visited a dear neighbor in the hospital.  Over the past few years as our neighbor, he has touched my whole family and earned a special place in our hearts.  As we approached the hospital, we met a mutual friend in the parking lot, and she warned us, "If I did not know it was supposed to be him in the bed, I would not have recognized him."  This statement is very similar to one I made to my husband a couple of weeks ago, but I knew his condition had deteriorated even more rapidly since then.

            Sometimes expressing love and kindness to someone who really needs—and wants—it can be difficult.  Yet, that's where we were on Friday.  This dear man did not look like or respond the way we had become accustomed to seeing him.  Even so, he was the same worthy man that deserved to be reminded that he was loved and appreciated.  A person's outer appearance or physical condition does not determine his or her worthiness.  We were there for him.  We were there to hold his hand and remind him that he was loved.  Despite our intentions, we realistically knew that we may not receive any indication from him that he appreciated or understood our presence.  However, for one brief moment, he had complete clarity as he looked at us and clearly expressed words of thankfulness.

            We left him after a very short time, because we did not want him to keep working hard to try to be conscious for us.  At the last minute, we stopped at McDonald's for a drink (and a snack for one of us) before going home.  While there, we received a message that the hospital had begun preparing him for I.C.U. and had called in his family.  We thanked God that he allowed us to visit when we did, so we could have, what would mostly likely be, our last visit with our neighbor.

            Expressing love and kindness is not always easy or fun, but it is worth doing.  Both you and the recipient will be rewarded.

#9—Would You Like a Smile with That?

Even the smallest of businesses
has a real person behind it.

26 Expressions of Love and Kindness Plus 1

#9—Would You Like a Smile with That?

            Have you ever worked on the employee side of a counter waiting on customers?  Maybe it was in a fast food restaurant.  Maybe it was as a retail cashier.  Maybe it was as a janitor in a busy building or a receptionist in a office.  If so, did you find days were you felt like you were treated like an object rather than a person?  How often do you do that to people who serve you in their jobs?

            To be honest, it is understandable.  We are busy.  We go to the store to get what we need.  We go to a restaurant to get food.  We do not go to find an everlasting friendship with the person who is taking our money.  However, that can happen.  Then what can you do to express love and kindness to someone you barely know and may never see again?

            How about one of these:

            1.  Smile and look at the cashier/waiter/waitress in the eye and say, "Hello.  How are you today?"  Then actually listen to the answer.

            2.  Sincerely thank this person for his/her help and wish him/her to have a good day.

            3.  If a snafu happens with your order or you have to wait longer because of a snafu with the person ahead of you, patiently wait and calmly respond, "That's o.k.  I understand.  Things do not always happen like they are suppose to."

            4.  Call the person helping you by name.  Hint:  look at his or her name tag.  If he/she is not wearing a name tag but is someone who has often helped you, ask.  "I see you here all the time, what's your first name?"  Then use his/her name that day and each time you go to that establishment in the future.

            It is simply a matter of remembering that they are not robots or an appendage of a business.  It is remembering that they, too, are people with frustrations, worries, and hopes.  They, too, want the same respect and treatment that you would like to receive. 

            So, the next time you go into a business, instead of just expecting someone to make you feel better about shopping there, plan to make an employee have a better day by expressing a little kindness.  As you are parting from your "cashier," pretend you are asking, "Would you like a smile with that?" and then give him or her huge grinning goodbye as you purposely comment, "Have a wonderful day."

#8--No Effort

Unfortunately, this isn't my doing;
it is part of Thanksgiving fixin's.

26 Expressions of Love and Kindness Plus 1

#8—No effort

            One of the favorite gifts I received when I gave birth to most of my children was a meal brought in for my whole family.  It was just what I (and my family) needed, and we all loved it.  We never knew what we were going to get, but every meal touched my family with a big helping of love and kindness.

            Consequently, one of the things I most often think about giving to other people, especially people going through a difficult time or even just an adjustment, is a meal.  However, I am ashamed to say that I rarely follow through with this grand idea.  My primary excuse is that I am not that great of a cook, and I do not want to disappoint someone.

           Even so, I have found a simple way to fulfill this plan with no (or only a little extra) effort.  That is:  just double the meal I am making for my family and deliver the extra to the family on my mind.  How easy is that?  This is very doable.  Now if only I could remember to follow through with it.  How about you?  Can you touch a family with a warm meal wrapped in love and kindness?  Will you actually do it?  Tell me about it.  Give me some inspiration to do this on a regular basis.  Once it becomes a habit, it truly will seemingly be no effort.